Interesting Articles

ANGER MANAGEMENT

Anger is a natural emotion, but it is the emotion most feared and disapproved of.

Think about your parents and your societies' reaction to anger. Do they accept that anger or try to get rid of it.

There is a difference between the emotion of anger and the expression of uncontrolled anger.

Mild anger can be expressed as annoyance or irritation.

Out of control anger is when a person lashes out, does hurtful things and says hurtful things that are hard to take back. This outburst usually hurts and offends others.

This outburst happens when a person tries to deny and push down their emotions until they become overwhelming and explode uncontrollably. It involves pushing the blame for their emotions onto another person as a way of avoiding their own feelings and responsibility. Think of a road rage situation, a person becomes very angry at something another driver does such as cutting in front of them etc. However, the level of anger is disproportionate to the event.

The healthy acceptance and expression of anger does not lead to these outbursts. If the anger is accepted and dealt with as it occurs, then there in no build up and, therefore, no outbursts. The anger a person feels relates to the present situation only and can be handled.

Sometimes, instead of explosive anger, a person turns anger in on themselves. This leads to self-hatred, feelings of not being good enough, low self-esteem etc.

The value of counselling and psychotherapy is in looking at the origins of a person’s anger and at the feelings behind the anger. It provides space where a person can face their anger and begin to understand it. Blutherapy would aim to integrate anger so that it does not become overwhelming and explosive.

FAMILY ISSUES

Families are complex structures. Your family is often your identity, especially when you are young. How you feel about yourself emotionally can depend on how you see your family structure. Everyone within the family has different personalities, beliefs, goals and desires which they are hoping to have met within the family structure.

However, families often get stuck and find it difficult to communicate with each other. They can also find it difficult to allow differences. This can lead to unrest and inability to express and be yourself within the family.

There are many complex issues that can cause families to become dysfunctional such as separation or divorce, domestic violence, family communication problems, families not allowing differences, mental health, siblings difficult interactions, trauma to name a few.

If a person feels that they cannot be themselves within a family, or find it emotionally difficult in the family, then psychotherapy can help them.

For example, if a family member comes out as gay, this may not be acceptable to the family, also, divorce and separation which destroys the current family unit can cause uncertainty and pain which needs to be worked through.

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